Siimon Reynolds’ book “Why People Fail” with Kevin Lovewell

Siimon Reynolds’ book “Why People Fail” with Kevin Lovewell – Chapter 13

Other people don’t kill our dreams – We do! … a continuing discussion about Siimon Reynolds’ book “Why People Fail” with Kevin Lovewell

Chapter 13: Few Relationships

The exciting thing about this chapter is that very few people ever seek excellence in relationship building. Therefore, devoting time to gaining expertise in this area will deliver an array of success tools that the competition in life and business will not be able to match. Just like Dale Carnegie in his very powerful book – “How to win friends and influence people” (which has sold at last count 15 million copies since being first published in 1936) Siimon understands the power of relationships – that no man is an island; and he provides simple to understand (somewhat harder to incorporate) philosophies and ideas.

Consider yourself being positioned at the centre of three concentric circles. There is an inner circle, one further out, and one more, even further out. The inner circle is that group of personal and professional contacts that you really value. The outer circle somewhat less “close” but who nonetheless bring a relationship that is easy, warm and fun to have. Because the circles are always expanding and evolving, the far outside circle is representative of those who move into your life. This acknowledgement permits you to find places for them inside the inner and outer circles – or simply permit these new acquaintances to move through and on.

Here are the simple actions. Being appreciative of the work and effort given by people inside your inner circle works. Listening and focusing on what these people say, want, need – especially those inside the first circle, pays dividends. Being upbeat is important. These people should come from both personal and professional friends and colleagues. They need to be “touched” at least weekly, and the contact needs to add value to both giver and receiver.

Compliment
Smile often
Touch occasionally
Create an emotional bank account
Seek first to understand and then to be understood

It is not being cynical or exploitive when you surround yourself with people who you like, appreciate and can help. This in turn can help you.

Now because you have to be in touch with your inner circle regularly, there are few prescriptive elements, so “How” is entirely discretionary. There is however a discipline contained within these actions. This discipline is to permit those who matter, to receive the support they need, which also gives you, the support you need. Those that do not matter need to be allowed to progress through and on. It may appear somewhat mercenary but in many instances it is well and truly emphasises the relationships that matter, and these should be nurtured.

Action Step

The simple truth – If you aspire to excellence but do not have strong relationships with a team of knowledgeable advisors, you are dramatically impeding your speed of ascent to the top. If you really want to excel – Siimon shines a light on the works of people like Dale Carnegie.

If you need more information, please talk to me:
Kevin Lovewell

0401 308 385

1 – Taken from the book “Why People Fail – the sixteen obstacles to success and how to overcome them” – Siimon Reynolds

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this article are those of the Writer. The information is not meant to be exhaustive. Readers are responsible for making their own inquiries and assessments as to the truth and accuracy of all the information given and should seek advice from professionals. No liability (in contract, tort or otherwise) will be accepted for any loss or damage incurred as a result of reliance upon any material contained in this publication or any information or advice provided in this publication or incorporated in it.